Do I ever get to be okay?

I’m fine. I’m fine. I’m just a fine person who takes medication three times a day. I’m fine.

The pills are just a thing I do right now, they aren’t real to me. They aren’t potent little bombs on my brain chemistry. And yet, there I was, hot and cold and seeing stars with my head over a toilet this morning, unable to move.

It turns out if you try to take a missed dose or two at once, withdrawal and uptake at the same time can be a bitch. Reality took the form of a cold shower over full clothing as I groaned on the floor and asked myself, “do I ever get to be okay?”


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